Epilogue 13 Infinity of Experience
Epilogue, Part Thirteen –Infinity of Experience: Those Times You Absolutely Hate, The Divinity Within You Might Be Finding Interesting. Easily Ungrateful Humans
Infinity of Experience ~ Infinite God: Sorry to Hear About Your Animal-Killing Toejam, but the Universe Only Gives You What You Can Handle
Being God in Spite of You
But it’s all Love. Y’know? It’s all Love that we give each other because, in spite of ourselves, we can’t help but be God.
Spite Your Nose Off Your Face
There’s another verse to the song we used to sing: “In spite of ourselves, we’re gonna end up a sittin on a rainbow… Against all odds, yeah, we’re the big door prize…”
There’s the knowledge, there, you see?
“We’re gonna spite our noses right off of our faces…”
That’s true. That’s God speaking, y’see?
“Won’t be nothing but big ol’ hearts dancing in our eyes.”
Nothing but Love. And that’s THE TRUTH.
[“That is the truth. And boy I think you’re …. The experience of death and what is beyond that. Because we can’t change experience, and it’s like the tragedy, the….. Seeing how cruel people can be….”]
Easily Ungrateful = Human
But you’re already forgetting. You see? It’s harder when you just have it in your mind, because in bemoaning the tragedy of your life you’ve forgotten that you were grateful for all those experiences at some point in your life.
[“I am. That’s what I know is that I am grateful. That’s what I was thinking a while back…is that the sum total..those of us who’ve given been given so-called hellacious experiences? We can be even doubly thankful, because without all that we wouldn’t be learning so much, as Baba says, for, you know, for Liberation.….”]
Long Peek-a-Boo .. Increase Pain, Increase Motivation
Yes, you might say it’s kind of like a very long peek-a-boo experience, where the face of God is the most hidden,
makes you want it more and more and more and to strive more and more and more to change that. And, well, it’s actually true, you know? We take any kind of experience of misery or discomfort. And when you you increase the pain of it, you increase the motivation for dealing with it and going beyond it.
[“Yeah.”]
Sorry to Hear About Your Animal-Killing Toejam
And that’s the thing that’s beautiful about it. It’s like, you know you’re God when you can say you’ve got chronic fatigue, you’ve got flatulence disease, you’ve got up-the-wazoo inflammation…you’ve got all kinds of…phlegm cancer, y’know? Or you’ve got a really bad toejam that’s cancerous and, uh, killing off your animals… I mean, y’know? You know what I’m sayin.
[“And so finish you’re point, you were really, what? So then you’d really be thankful, for these experiences, because you’ll be super-sensitized to the opposite to the nth degree and really grok being blissful…”]
You know you’re really coming from your Divinity when you can accept any of that as being good for you and, though you’re not
knowing at the time, you are calm in your knowing that you will find out at some point, maybe some day, or even after this life, that you were lucky to have those experiences….
The point is that experiences are just experiences. Since there is no death, really, and all pain is temporary, and Ultimate Reality is Bliss-Beauty-Awareness, then every experience in the Universe is at least interesting and often a whole lot more. The good stuff is delightful; the bad stuff “seasons” the good stuff, making it that much richer and more intense.
And what is really bad is something we imagine but does not exist: That the suffering that happens is meaningless or is overwhelming.
I’m seeing that you can say, “I can’t handle it.” But actually, what we usually say is, “I won’t be able to handle it.” You see? How often do we say “I can’t handle it?” Not much, right? We say, “I won’t be able to handle it.” So right there is an indication that we are prejudging what it will be like; in fear we are magnifying ahead of time what something unpleasant will be like and minimizing our ability to handle it.
Trusting What God Gives Me… That’s Faith
But the insubstantiality of those fears has even become common knowledge in some circles. It’s one of those truths that people are starting to pick up on a lot if they have a lot of experience with pain. Like alcoholics, for example. Of course there are many other kinds of people who suffer a lot but just as an example we know that alcoholics and drug addicts are folks who have had a lot of negative, painful experiences. And yet they’re the ones who, after going through all that hell … and I’ve gone through it … they’re the ones who are saying, “God only gives me that which I can accept…” In their 12-step programs, their AA and so on, you will hear, “God only gives me that which I am able to handle at any particular time.” Now, that’s faith.
An Interesting Experience, Anyway
Now to some that might sound macho or cocky. It could be taken as “Oh, I’m cool. This program ain’t gonna get the best of me. I’m gonna be handling this, man. I can take it!” And while that is not true in terms of what that saying means, still, accepting the pain can be done with a kind of dying strain of determination, a kind of self-flagellation to ward off the fear one has that unless one toughens oneself, future pain will be even more overwhelming. And that is hardly faith.
This faith I’m talking about is trust. It’s trust, but it is something else. It is an awareness, however dim, that pain is not all painful, is not 100% painful. That a part of us, the part that is Divine, is at least finding it interesting. It is at least making for quite a story, and in that way is better than a lame boring life story in which all pain is somehow kept away. It is an awareness that Reality does not contain irreconcilable extremes of heaven and hell, but that, as the Tao symbol indicates, even in darkness, in pain, there is a seed of enjoyment; and in light, in pleasure that allows no darkness, there is indeed a seed of darkness.
For, yes, as God, the part of us that’s God, these distasteful experiences are kind of like eating an anchovy. You know? It’s like your Divine self is going, “God! This tastes like shit, man! But you know, it is that the more I chew on it…it’s a more interesting experience than I’ve had for quite a while, y’know?” And then our divinity is going, “Hell I might even try caviar or some godawful fish eggs some time…. Just to see what it is like, just to have the experience of it.” You know what I’m saying?
It’s just something different.
[“Yeah.”]
Something different … and so, interesting.
[“That’s right.”]
Infinity of Experience ~ Infinite God
And in an infinity of experience…. Why can’t there be an infinity of experience? Don’t you see? For when does God stop growing? Why does there ever have to be an end? Why does there have to be an end to the variety and possibilities of experiencing, the possibilities of existing, of Existence!
Why does there ever have to be an end?
[“…end for human life…”]
No, I’m saying when does God stop growing? Cause I’m saying that God is all knowledge.
[“Yeah.”]
But He’s infinitely experiencing, and He has for all time. So, with an infinity of experiences, there’s always going to be newness…. Newness, interest, fascination, poignancy … magnificence. The magnificence of the All That Is.
[“Yeah.”]
And yet, He’s been doing it for all time. So how fascinating is that? How fantastic?
[“Wow.”]
Continue with Four Falls from Grace … And Back Again: Becoming Human Is Love’s Supreme Act of Recklessness, and Death to Everyone … Makes It Fun
Return to Fun Times Waking from Nightmares and Being God in Spite of You: “Won’t Be Nothing but Big ol’ Hearts Dancing in Our Eyes”
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